Are Muslims Sexually Repressed?

The original question asked was:

Are American (or even non-Muslim Asian) cultures really more sexually repressed than Islamic cultures?

And I answered:

I'm not convinced that Islamic cultures (or, at the very least, Islamic culture here in SE Asia) are as sexually repressed as you might think. All these kids aren't delivered by stork, ya know! ;) However, Muslims generally believe that private matters between husband and wife stay within the family and are not discussed with others. And I think that this lack of discussion outside the family may be creating a perception among non-Muslims that Muslims are sexually repressed when we're not. (And the same reasoning may explain other groups, such as American conservative protestants who also have a perception of being sexually repressed.)

To which the followup question was:

How so -- isn't Islam pretty unequivocal about condemning homosexuality and sex outside of marriage?

Islam also requires a strict code of modest dress, and sex segregation is part of many Muslim cultures.

What definition of "sexual repression" are you using?

And my response is:

I don't view any of these things as being indicative of "sexual repression." Homosexuality and sex outside of marriage is forbidden especially so as to prevent the spread of various diseases; likewise, sex outside of marriage is forbidden so as to give any resulting child from any sexual activity the chance to grow up within a nuclear family, supported by both parents both emotionally and financially. As for gender segregation, this is done only to prevent improper behavior between the sexes.

The thing about "modest dress" and, indeed, the entire notion of "sexual repression" among Muslims is that what non-Muslims see is merely our public face, what we Muslims want you to see. What you don't see is the private face of Muslim life away from non-Muslims. The dress codes for both men and women are indeed about modesty, piety and avoiding improper behavior, but that has nothing to do with Muslim family life, when the hijab comes off. For me, sexual repression is about the fundamental attitudes people have toward sexual behavior: procreation only vs. procreation and pleasure vs. pleasure only. Islam definitely encourages the middle view: procreation and pleasure. We love to have sex for the pleasurable and loving experience, but we also love kids (and I think the demographic statistics bear that latter statement out; certainly the Christians are worried about Muslim birth rates).

So I would say, don't confuse what you see with reality. :) By this I mean, seek to understand the reasoning behind what the Qur'an and Sunnah command, whether that thing is allowed or forbidden. The biggest problem Islamophobes have in understanding Islam and Muslim culture is that they take almost everything at face value and react off of what they see. But they have little to no understanding of the deeper meanings or reasonings behind our concepts and behaviors. These people the Qur'an compares with the "lolling dog" (7:176) or cattle (7:179, 25:44, 47:12). The Qur'an really does expect Muslims to understand the deeper meanings, not just what lies on the surface.

The Questions

One of the interesting things about the Qur'an is that there are a number of verses (at least 21) that I think of collectively as "The Questions." Each of the questions are framed in an "either-or" format: your answer is either one or the other. The answer to each of the questions is painfully obvious to a believer (in this case I don't think there even needs to be a distinction between Muslims, Jews or Christians). For a non-believer, I think the questions are more challenging, especially some of the more nature-oriented verses, like 56:58-9. Sperm are created within the male body, and a typical man can ejaculate over 40 million sperm at any one time; yet, how many of those sperm did we "create?" Do we have any conscious control over the creation of sperm, say, with respect to different features of a body (e.g., hair color, shape of the nose, etc.)? No, of course not. Through Allah's (swt) will, our bodies create the sperm in the way that He decides, not in how we choose.

If you know of any other "Questions" in the Qur'an that I missed, please add them in the comments.

Is the man who follows the good pleasure of God Like the man who draws on himself the wrath of God, and whose abode is in Hell?- A woeful refuge! (3:162)

Is it not (the case) that to God belongeth whatever is in the heavens and on earth? Is it not (the case) that God's promise is assuredly true? Yet most of them understand not. (10:55)

Is then one who doth know that that which hath been revealed unto thee from thy Lord is the Truth, like one who is blind? It is those who are endued with understanding that receive admonition;- (13:19)

Is then He who standeth over every soul (and knoweth) all that it doth, (like any others)? And yet they ascribe partners to God. Say: "But name them! is it that ye will inform Him of something he knoweth not on earth, or is it (just) a show of words?" Nay! to those who believe not, their pretense seems pleasing, but they are kept back (thereby) from the path. And those whom God leaves to stray, no one can guide. (13:33)

Is then He Who creates like one that creates not? Will ye not receive admonition? (16:17)

Is then the man who believes no better than the man who is rebellious and wicked? Not equal are they. (32:18)

Is he, then, to whom the evil of his conduct is made alluring, so that he looks upon it as good, (equal to one who is rightly guided)? For God leaves to stray whom He wills, and guides whom He wills. So let not thy soul go out in (vainly) sighing after them: for God knows well all that they do! (35:8)

Is it not to God that sincere devotion is due? But those who take for protectors other than God (say): "We only serve them in order that they may bring us nearer to God." Truly God will judge between them in that wherein they differ. But God guides not such as are false and ungrateful. (39:3)

Is one who worships devoutly during the hour of the night prostrating himself or standing (in adoration), who takes heed of the Hereafter, and who places his hope in the Mercy of his Lord - (like one who does not)? Say: "Are those equal, those who know and those who do not know? It is those who are endued with understanding that receive admonition. (39:9)

Is, then, one against whom the decree of Punishment is justly due (equal to one who eschews Evil)? Wouldst thou, then, deliver one (who is) in the Fire? (39:19)

Is one whose heart God has opened to Islam, so that he has received Enlightenment from God, (no better than one hard-hearted)? Woe to those whose hearts are hardened against celebrating the praises of God! they are manifestly wandering (in error)! (39:22)

Is, then, one who has to fear the brunt of the Penalty on the Day of Judgment (and receive it) on his face, (like one guarded therefrom)? It will be said to the wrong- doers: "Taste ye (the fruits of) what ye earned!" (39:24)

Is not God enough for his Servant? But they try to frighten thee with other (gods) besides Him! for such as God leaves to stray, there can be no guide. (39:36)

Is then one brought up among trinkets, and unable to give a clear account in a dispute (to be associated with God)? (43:18)

Is then one who is on a clear (Path) from his Lord, no better than one to whom the evil of his conduct seems pleasing, and such as follow their own lusts? (47:14)

Is it that their faculties of understanding urge them to this, or are they but a people transgressing beyond bounds? (52:32)

Do ye then see?- The (human Seed) that ye throw out,- Is it ye who create it, or are We the Creators? (56:58-9)

See ye the seed that ye sow in the ground? Is it ye that cause it to grow, or are We the Cause? (56:63-4)

See ye the Fire which ye kindle? Is it ye who grow the tree which feeds the fire, or do We grow it? (56:71-2)

Is then one who walks headlong, with his face groveling, better guided,- or one who walks evenly on a Straight Way? (67:22)

Is not God the wisest of judges? (95:8)

Republican Sex Scandal Flow Chart

In case you're having trouble in keeping track of who's done what to whom. ;) Actually, the flow chart could use some updating with some of the following names:

Bob Allen, Ted Haggard, Jeff Gannon, Ed Schrock, Neil Bush, Dan Burton, Dan Crane, Helen Chenoweth, Henry Hyde, Newt Gingrich, Jim Bunn, Ken Calvert, Jim Bakker, Roy Cohn, Strom Thurmond, etc.

Granted, my list goes a little further back in time; this flow chart only covers the last three years. Regardless, the list goes on and on. These are only some of the more prominent examples, mostly at the federal level of government. For every name above, there are perhaps three to five names at the state and local levels of government.

Eyesight Problems?

ROTFLMAO! Don't drink the yoghurt! ;)

Links for 14 May 2009

Politics:
What Obama Means when he says "the troops" ("People keep telling me that America is a better place since 20 January 2009. As with the claims of economic recovery 'right around the corner,' there is precious little evidence.")

Countdown's Worst Person: Your Not So Grass Roots Are Showing

RNC having special session to brand the Democratic Party 'Socialists' (I'll accept the "socialist" moniker as long as we can call the Republicans "Nazis.")

C&L's Late Night Music Club with Yusuf Islam (The website Crooks & Liars does a nightly music video, with tonight's video being Yusuf Islam's Peace Train.)

Daily Show's Jason Jones explores ASU's pristine academic environment (As an alumnus of Arizona State twice over (Bachelors and Masters), I find Jones' humor lame. As anyone remotely affiliated with the university would know, that's not the library. And the students he interviewed strike me as fraternity/sorority types; you know, not exactly the brightest bulbs on campus. BTW, Jason, what university did you graduate from? Ryerson University? Where's that?)

Did You Have Your Bowl of Cholesterol Drugs This Morning? (An interesting story developing between the FDA and General Mills: the way in which Cheerios, the breakfast cereal, is being marketed has caused the FDA to declare the cereal a drug. "General Mills may not legally market Cheerios unless it applies for approval as a new drug or changes the way it labels the small, doughnut-shaped cereal, the FDA said.")

GOP icon declares his party "brain dead" (The rest of us already knew this...)


Economics:
The Renminbi as the Reserve Currency? (There's an interesting thought! Not that it would happen anytime soon...)

China Expands Global Role


Islam/Muslim Blogs:
Of Life and Star Trek and Sex Education (Rozas' take on a conversation between some teenage Malay girls is rather interesting.)

The BNP is a threat to every Muslim

Just one in eight terror arrests ends with guilty verdict, admits Home Office


Miscellaneous:
A Space Shuttle Before Dawn (The space shuttle Atlantis, sitting on Launch Pad 39A, back in April, as it was being prepared for its launch a few days ago. Cool pic.)

INTERVIEW: C.J. Cherryh (CJ Cherryh is one of my favorite SF authors; she recently gave a brief interview in connection with her new novel, Regenesis, which is a sequel to her 1988 novel, Cyteen. Good news!)

382 – Two Eggs and a Kidney: Regional World Cities (Strange Maps is a blog I've been reading for quite a while now; check it out if you're unfamiliar with it. With respect to this map, I'm a little surprised LA isn't considered at least a major regional center, as Singapore and Hong Kong are. These latter two cities (S'pore and HK) do seem to be mirror images of each other in terms of being major regional centers, but I would expect people from Sydney might argue about whether they or S'pore has more influence in the southern half of the Asia and Oceania map.)

Corri Fetman's Sexual Harassment Case

Corri Fetman's back in the news; if you don't remember who she is, she's the Chicago divorce attorney who advertised her law firm on the idea that it's better to divorce now in order to marry your trophy husband/wife. She later appeared in a nude Playboy pictorial and wrote the "Lawyer of Love" column for the magazine. (I wrote about her back in 2007; see Life's Short. Get a Divorce. Be a Pathetic Loser. (be sure to read the comment on that post) and Life's Short. Your Marriage Doesn't Have to Be.)

Anyway, it turns out that Fetman was allegedly sexually harassed by a former executive at the magazine. According to the Sydney Morning Herald:

Corri Fetman, 45, who authored the Lawyer of Love column, alleged Thomas Hagopian, an executive for the digital branch of Playboy Enterprises, bombarded her with sexually explicit email messages and phone calls, groped her and took away her column last July when she repeatedly rebuffed his advances.

...

Ms Fetman's suit, filed in Cook County Circuit Court, seeks more than $US4.5 million ($A6.6 million) in damages for, among other things, "gender violence" and emotional distress.

Now, based on what I've read in the article, I agree that she probably has been sexually harassed, and that shouldn't have happened. As her attorney said in the article, "Sometimes attractive women get unwanted attention," and that's completely true. On the other hand, I have very little sympathy for her. I mean, really, what did she expect? That she could pose nude publicly and there would be no consequences? That men would respect her for her mind when she has no respect for her body? Where was your modesty and humility the past two years, Corri?

Naomi Wolf: Veiled Sexuality

Naomi Wolf gets it. It's a shame most Westerners don't. Read the full article here.

But are we in the West radically misinterpreting Muslim sexual mores, particularly the meaning to many Muslim women of being veiled or wearing the chador? And are we blind to our own markers of the oppression and control of women?

The West interprets veiling as repression of women and suppression of their sexuality. But when I traveled in Muslim countries and was invited to join a discussion in women-only settings within Muslim homes, I learned that Muslim attitudes toward women’s appearance and sexuality are not rooted in repression, but in a strong sense of public versus private, of what is due to God and what is due to one’s husband. It is not that Islam suppresses sexuality, but that it embodies a strongly developed sense of its appropriate channeling – toward marriage, the bonds that sustain family life, and the attachment that secures a home.

Outside the walls of the typical Muslim households that I visited in Morocco, Jordan, and Egypt, all was demureness and propriety. But inside, women were as interested in allure, seduction, and pleasure as women anywhere in the world.

At home, in the context of marital intimacy, Victoria’s Secret, elegant fashion, and skin care lotions abounded. The bridal videos that I was shown, with the sensuous dancing that the bride learns as part of what makes her a wonderful wife, and which she proudly displays for her bridegroom, suggested that sensuality was not alien to Muslim women. Rather, pleasure and sexuality, both male and female, should not be displayed promiscuously – and possibly destructively – for all to see.

Indeed, many Muslim women I spoke with did not feel at all subjugated by the chador or the headscarf. On the contrary, they felt liberated from what they experienced as the intrusive, commodifying, basely sexualizing Western gaze. Many women said something like this: “When I wear Western clothes, men stare at me, objectify me, or I am always measuring myself against the standards of models in magazines, which are hard to live up to – and even harder as you get older, not to mention how tiring it can be to be on display all the time. When I wear my headscarf or chador, people relate to me as an individual, not an object; I feel respected.” This may not be expressed in a traditional Western feminist set of images, but it is a recognizably Western feminist set of feelings.

...

Nor are Muslim women alone. The Western Christian tradition portrays all sexuality, even married sexuality, as sinful. Islam and Judaism never had that same kind of mind-body split. So, in both cultures, sexuality channeled into marriage and family life is seen as a source of great blessing, sanctioned by God.

This may explain why both Muslim and orthodox Jewish women not only describe a sense of being liberated by their modest clothing and covered hair, but also express much higher levels of sensual joy in their married lives than is common in the West. When sexuality is kept private and directed in ways seen as sacred – and when one’s husband isn’t seeing his wife (or other women) half-naked all day long – one can feel great power and intensity when the headscarf or the chador comes off in the sanctity of the home.

...

I do not mean to dismiss the many women leaders in the Muslim world who regard veiling as a means of controlling women. Choice is everything. But Westerners should recognize that when a woman in France or Britain chooses a veil, it is not necessarily a sign of her repression. And, more importantly, when you choose your own miniskirt and halter top – in a Western culture in which women are not so free to age, to be respected as mothers, workers or spiritual beings, and to disregard Madison Avenue – it’s worth thinking in a more nuanced way about what female freedom really means.

HT: Rozas

Bedtime Music: Night Ranger - Sister Christian

OK, first, a personal update: I'm recovering. :) We don't know what I had -- some jungle fever -- but we did confirm today through a blood test that I didn't have dengue (thank God!); I've already gone through that once before. However, a lot of the symptoms were very similar to dengue, including the fever, chills, muscular aches, and rashes. You live in the tropics, you get tropical diseases. :P Add to this the fact that Milady is getting very close to delivering the baby (most likely sometime next week, insha'allah), and I haven't had any time to write any regular blog posts. (Update: We got a visit this morning from two guys with the NEA, who were trying to figure out how I came down with the fever; the gov't takes dengue prevention very seriously here. Based on our discussion this morning, I think they concluded that I got bit by a mosquito somewhere in the Little India area, which is the neighborhood where I work.)

Anyhoo... We're now halfway through the theme (if anyone's tried to guess it). This song, the 1984 release Sister Christian, was Night Ranger's biggest hit, peaking at #5 on the Billboard Hot 100, and #2 on the Hot Mainstream Rock Tracks chart. Drummer Kelly Keagy wrote the song after visiting his home and discovering just how quickly his younger sister, Christy, was growing up. Per Wikipedia:

The lyric, "You're motoring. What's your price for flight? In finding Mr. Right?" is the subject of much debate. The band stated in a VH-1 Behind the Music interview that the term "motoring" was synonymous with the term "cruising." The term is most often used to describe driving around in a car slowly as a social experience, but can also be used to describe picking up people for casual sex. When Keagy visited his family he heard second hand about his sister cruising for a man to casually sleep with. After verifying this with her he was shocked and lamented how fast she was growing up. He then went back home and wrote "Sister Christian" about the experience.

Apparently sister Christy was so mortified after the song was released that she nearly changed her name.

This particular clip comes from an old late night television show called Rock Palace.

Words Fail Me

I just can't seem to write something that expresses my complete and utter disgust at this couple. Insha'allah, the authorities will throw the book at them. From CNN:

A man and a woman have been charged by police in Italy after they were found having sex in a confession box, it was reported Wednesday.

The Italian ANSA news agency said the young man and woman were taken into custody by police in the northern city of Cesena following a telephone complaint from a man attending morning Mass in the city's cathedral.

Authorities were alerted after a parishoner heard "rustling and groaning" coming from inside the confession box and pulled back the curtains to reveal a goth-rock couple engaged in oral sex, ANSA said.

The agency said the pair -- a 31-year-old laborer and a 32-year-old teacher -- defended their conduct saying: "We are atheists and for us, having sex in church is like doing it any other place."

However, Bishop Antonio Lanfranchi of Cesena-Sarsina took said the couple's behavior was "an outrage of notable proportions which bespeaks unutterable squalor."

He added that a special ceremony would be held to purify the confession box.

What a Guy!

Oops, maybe not so much. Hope your wife didn't mind you giving all that satisfaction. ;)

HT: Advertising is Good for You

"Faux News Porn" Strikes Again

I had a good laugh when I saw this screen shot from Crooks & Liars. See the sign to the left of the reporter. "Hot Babes." You think the reporter and his camera man shot this footage just anywhere and was oblivious to the girlie billboard behind them? Then you're not familiar with Faux News Porn.

Would You Have Sex With This Man?

This guy, 77-year-old Rolf Eden, is laughable. He's privately humiliated by a 19-year-old girl, who wisely refuses to have sex with this lecher, only to set himself up for public humiliation by filing a frivolous lawsuit against the girl. Can you spell "S-E-N-I-L-I-T-Y"? From Der Spiegel:

According to Bild Zeitung on Thursday, the 77-year-old Eden has filed suit against a 19-year-old Berlin woman for the following reason: Despite a night on the town with Eden, which ended back at his place, she refused to have sex with him, saying the he was too old for her.

"That was shattering. No woman has ever said that to me before," Eden told the tabloid. "I was crushed." He has filed charges with the prosecutors' office, he said. "After all, there are laws against discrimination."

Eden is well known to older Germans for having been the king of Berlin nightlife in the 1950s and '60s. Indeed, he is said to have opened up Germany's first-ever discotheque. He's also known for popularizing stripteases in post-war West Germany and for doing his best to emulate Playboy founder Hugh Hefner.

In 2002, Eden -- who claims to have bedded between 2,000 and 3,000 women in his long life -- raised eyebrows with an article in a Berlin tabloid saying he would like to die while having sex. He wrote: "I would like to die as I have lived -- on a woman."

Despite the storied past, his most recent attempt ended in embarrassing failure. Even serving his 19-year-old quarry champagne and playing the piano for her didn't help.

"There are a few years separating us," the almost-octogenarian admits. "And there are some women who are too old for me. But in that case you have to be more diplomatic and say, 'Sorry, you're not my type.'"

Vietnam's Paris Hilton Moment

I thought this story was an interesting contrast between American and Asian society. Two female entertainers are videotaped having sex; one society applauds the woman to the benefit of her career, the other society scorns the woman to the detriment of her career. Can you imagine Paris Hilton being scorned by American society for her sex tape? Which society is @$$-backwards?

Vietnam is having a Paris Hilton moment.

An online sex video featuring a popular celebrity has riveted the nation for more than a week now, much as Hilton's clip seized the attention of Americans when it hit the Internet several years ago.

But unlike Hilton, the 19-year-old woman at the center of Vietnam's sex scandal won't be able to capitalize on her newfound notoriety.

Hoang Thuy Linh's show has been canceled and the actress has made a tearful farewell on national television.

"I made a mistake, a terrible mistake," said the doe-faced teen, who had cultivated a good-girl image. "I apologize to you, my parents, my teachers and my friends."

Her fall from grace has highlighted the generational fault-lines in Vietnam, a sexually conservative culture within which women have been taught for centuries to remain chaste until marriage and stay true to one man — no matter how many times he cheats on them.

Like everything else in this economically booming country, ideas about sex and gender roles are quickly changing as satellite TV and the Internet bring Western influences to a society cut off by decades of war and economic isolation.

But for many in communist Vietnam, new ideas about free love are much harder to accept than the free market. And unlike men, women who break the old sexual taboos are not easily forgiven.

"Kids today are crazy," said Nguyen Thi Khanh, 49, a Hanoi junior high school teacher. "They often exceed the limits of morality. They have sex and fall in love when they're much too young."

In the old days, Khanh said, a woman who had sex before marriage would be ostracized.

"A good girl must keep herself clean until she is married," Khanh said. "Thuy Linh should be condemned. If I ever see her again on TV, I will turn it off, for sure."

In "Vang Anh's Diaries," Thuy Linh portrayed an earnest high school girl, modern and stylish but determined to uphold the traditional virtues of "cong, dung, ngon" and "hanh," which promote women as tidy, charming, soft-spoken and chaste.

Then the 16-minute video hit the Internet on Oct. 15 featuring Thuy Linh in bed with her former boyfriend, both of them apparently aware that they were on camera.

On Thursday, Hanoi police detained four college students accused of posting the sex clip to the Internet. They could face charges of "spreading depraved cultural items," which carries a sentence of six months to 15 years if convicted.

Police identified the man in the clip as 20-year-old Vu Hoang Viet, who is currently studying overseas. They said a friend copied the film off of Viet's laptop, and passed it along to other friends who then posted it online.

Most of the public's wrath has been directed at Thuy Linh rather than Viet.

"People will forgive him, but not her," said Tran Minh Nguyet of the Vietnam Women's Union, which promotes gender equality. "Vietnamese think it's OK for a boy to have sex at that age, but not for a girl. It's absolutely unfair."

The video has been the talk of Vietnam. Even members of Vietnam's National Assembly were overheard gossiping about it last week at the opening of the new legislative session.

A few lonely voices have sprung up in Thuy Linh's defense. But in most newspapers and on blogs and Web sites, the video has become the target of jokes and condemnation.

VietnamNet, a popular online newspaper, said the episode underscored the "dark side of globalization" and warned that a flood of foreign influences "threaten Vietnam's cultural foundation."

The scandal also has disillusioned many of Thuy Linh's biggest fans.

"She was supposed to set a good example for Vietnamese students nationwide," said Chi, 14, a Hanoi junior high school student who declined to give her full name. "Now this scandal has ruined everything. It's completely destroyed her image."

Hilton's sex tape, made with then-boyfriend Rick Salomon in eerie night-vision green, surfaced just before the start of her reality TV series, "The Simple Life" and helped propel her to superstardom.

But in Vietnam, the video scandal is certain to destroy Thuy Linh's career, said Nguyet of the Vietnam Women's Union.

"Vietnam is changing quickly, but there's no way Thuy Linh will be forgiven," Nguyet said. "That will take another generation."

You've Never Looked Smarter

One wonders exactly what this ad really means. This comes from a company called Allergan, which makes silicone breast implants. So, which definition of "smarter" should we use? Let's consider the various meanings to the word. I see only three that can possibly apply:

a: NEAT, TRIM (soldiers in smart uniforms) b: stylish or elegant in dress or appearance c (1): appealing to sophisticated tastes (2): characteristic of or patronized by fashionable society

If the woman had been dressed up in this photo, in a nice gown or woman's business suit, the ad's slogan might make sense for this particular meaning. But she's dressed too casually for this to be the case.


a: WITTY, CLEVER (a smart sitcom) b: PERT, SAUCY (don't get smart with me)

Variations on the ability to make certain types of comments. If this had been a TV ad, this meaning might have worked (we could see and hear the woman speaking).


a: mentally alert : BRIGHT b: KNOWLEDGEABLE c: SHREWD (a smart investment)

Getting breast implants will make a woman more intelligent? Uh, yeah, right. I really do think that this is the meaning the ad company wants you to get (bigger tits = bigger brains; "Gee, look at my breasts, I'm so smart now!"), but the third definition, "shrewd," is, I think, closest to the mark. Allergan's trying to suggest, IMO, that only smart girls will get breast implants because they know how much they stand to benefit (materially, sexually, etc.) from our breast-obsessed culture.

Dance: ten; Looks; three.
And I'm still on unemployment,
Dancing for my own enjoyment.
That ain't it, kid. That ain't it, kid.

"Dance: ten; Looks; three,"
I'd like to die!
Left the theater and
Called the doctor for
My appointment to buy...

Tits and ass.
Bought myself a fancy pair.
Tightened up the derrière.
Did the nose with it.
All that goes with it.

Tits and ass!
Had the bingo-bongos done.
Suddenly I'm getting nash'nal tours!
Tits and ass won't get you jobs
Unless they're yours.

Didn't cost a fortune neither.
Didn't hurt my sex life either.

Flat and sassy,
I would get the strays and losers.
Beggars really can't be choosers.
That ain't it, kid. That ain't it, kid.

Fixed the chassis.
"How do you do!"
Life turned into and
Endless medley of
"Gee it had to be you!"
Why?

Tits and ass!
Where the cupboard once was bare
Now you knock and someone's there.
You have got 'em, hey.
Top to bottom, hey.

It's a gas!
Just a dash of silicone.
Shake your new maracas and you're fine!
Tits and ass can change your life.
They sure changed mine.

Have it all done.
Honey, take my word.
Grab a cab, c'mon.
See the wizard on
Park and Seventy-Third
For

Tits and ass.
Orchestra or balcony.
What they want is whatcha see.
Keep the best of you.
Do the rest of you.

Pits or class.
I have never seen it fail.
Debutante or chorus girl or wife.

Tits and ass,
Yes, tits and ass
Have changed...
My...
Life...!
-- A Chorus Line: Dance: Ten; Looks: Three

Oy Vey!

Stories like these make me wonder just how the nation of Israel vets its potential ambassadors. It sounds like they're not having a whole lot of luck.

JERUSALEM – Israel has recalled its ambassador to El Salvador after he was found bound, drunk and nude, according to Israeli media reports confirmed Monday by a government spokeswoman.

The longtime diplomat, Tsuriel Raphael, has been removed from his post and the Foreign Ministry has begun searching for a replacement, said ministry spokeswoman Zehavit Ben-Hillel.

Two weeks ago, El Salvador police found Raphael naked outside his residence, tied up, gagged and drunk, Israeli media reported. He was wearing several sex toys at the time, the media said. After he was untied, Raphael told police he was the ambassador of Israel, the reports said.

Ben-Hillel said the reports were accurate and that Raphael has been recalled, although he did not break any laws. "We're talking about behavior that is unbecoming of a diplomat," she said.

The ambassador did not file a police complaint in the incident, she said.

Raphael had served for six months as the ambassador in El Salvador and for several years at different missions around the world, she said.

The embarrassing affair was one of several involving Israeli diplomats in recent years. In 2000, Israel's ambassador to France died of cardiac arrest in a Paris hotel under circumstances the Foreign Ministry refused to publicize. Media reports said he was with a woman who was not his wife at the time.

Last year, Israel replaced its ambassador to Australia, Naftali Tamir, after he said Israel and Australia are "like sisters" because both are located in Asia and their peoples don't have the Asian characteristics of "yellow skin and slanted eyes."

In 2005, Israel canceled the appointment of a diplomat to Australia after it was discovered that he published pictures of nude Brazilian women on the Internet while on a mission in Brazil.

Which is More Important...

...to the cowardly right? The medical treatment of soldiers at Walter Reed Hospital?


[Method: Google search on the last three months for term, "Walter Reed" minus term "Code Pink." Results were hand searched to find posts about neglect at Walter Reed.]

Or the fact that the cowardly right can't get it up any more?


You decide.

(h/t: Patriotboy)

Welcome to America, Kid!

There's a rather funny/scary account of a Polish teenager who spent some time in North Carolina as a foreign exchange student. The problem was, the host family was an extreme Christian fundamentalist family. How extreme? Check out these passages:

"...every Monday my host family would gather around the kitchen table to talk about sex. My host parents hadn't had sex for the last 17 years because -- so they told me -- they were devoting their lives to God. They also wanted to know whether I drank alcohol. I admitted that I liked beer and wine. They told me I had the devil in my heart.

"My host parents treated me like a five-year-old. They gave me lollipops. They woke me every Sunday morning at 6:15 a.m., saying 'Michael, it's time to go to church.' I hated that sentence. When I didn't want to go to church one morning, because I had hardly slept, they didn't allow me to have any coffee.

"One day I was talking to my host parents about my mother, who is separated from my father. They were appalled -- my mother's heart was just as possessed by the devil as mine, they exclaimed. God wanted her to stay with her husband, they said.

"...the religious zealots finally brought up a subject which had clearly been on their minds for a long time: They wanted me to help them set up a Fundamentalist Baptist church in my home country of Poland. It was God's will, they said. They tried to slip the topic casually into conversation, but it really shocked me -- I realized that was the only reason they had welcomed me into their family. They had already started construction work in Krakow -- I was to help them with translations and with spreading their faith via the media."

The rest of the story can be read here.

Don't Ask, Don't Tell?

These are two rather odd print ads for towels from World War 2, and I've been trying to think through the purpose of the images. Of course, many ads from that era featured soldiers in one manner or another, and ads for towels such as these two would naturally feature a bathing scene like these. But in this day and age, the pictures strike me as being rather homoerotic. So what message is the artist trying to convey? Was he (or she) trying to titilliate the women back home while their boyfriends and husbands were off to war? That the troops were comfortable enough with their sexuality so that they could joke and frolick with each other while being nude? Or that the bond between fellow soldiers in a prolonged male environment (fighting in a war against other men) becomes stronger than normal, perhaps to the point of the men becoming gay?

One other thing to note in the above picture are the dark, silent natives in the background. They stand and stare at the white soldiers while the latter are oblivious to the spectacle they are creating.

From Boing Boing.

Sex on the Brain

Looking at one of my hit counters this morning, I was struck by how many people currently have sex on the brain. Aren't you guys supposed to be celebrating Christmas or something? Ho, ho, ho, and all that?

Out of the past 20 search engine referrals (such as those made by Google, Yahoo, etc.), 13 had something to do with nudity with 2 more being questionable. Of the 13, eight people wanted to see the Indian tennis star, Sania Mirza, naked (what else is new?), two wanted to see nude pictures of coeds from Arizona State University (this is regarding the upcoming Playboy pictorial that will be published next year), and then there was one each for Angela Keathley (the ex-Carolina Panther cheerleader who may or may not have been having lesbian sex in a bar's bathroom stall), a generic "young mother posing nude" (hey, perv, you wanna see the kid too?), and one for "JD erotic photos" (sorry, wrong JD, no erotic photos here). The two that are questionable included one for "sania mirza's skirt" (uh, it looks like any other woman tennis player's skirt?) and another for "texas street korea." The latter is a (in)famous street in the "Russian" neighborhood of Busan, Korea, near some of the piers, where you can find a number of Russian bars, stores, and hookers. (I visited there briefly one night to see what the place was like.)

I've got a few more comments to make regarding what my visitors want (including a survey I took on people looking for information/photos on Sania Mirza), but those will be in later posts, insha'allah.

Arizona State University: Truth, Knowledge, A Great Tan!

There was an interesting set of articles in the Arizona Republic the other day about my alma mater, Arizona State University. In one article, it seems that ASU will be listed in the May edition of Playboy magazine for being one of the top ten party schools in the U.S. But the University's President, Michael Crow, isn't terribly happy.

"In ASU's case, the party-school ranking is 'a gross simplification that doesn't have anything to do with who we are and what we are,' Crow says.

"Crow has made an enormous effort to ratchet up the academics. He hired Ed Prescott, who then won the 2004 Nobel Prize in economic sciences. He helped recruit 162 National Merit Scholars to attend ASU last fall. He envisions a 'New American University' that will offer quality education to many and foster economic growth.

"Now comes Playboy's list.

"'How do they really know?' Crow asks. 'How do they really assess that? ASU is a very serious school with very serious students. It's also a place where people have a great time and is a great place to be.'

"The party-school image stems partly from some of ASU's inherent qualities. It's huge, with about 52,000 students on the Tempe campus alone. It's sunny and warm throughout the school year.

"In the Princeton Review, some ASU students describe the school like this:

"It's a place where 'almost everyone is beautiful: tall, blond, skinny, and bronzed. . . . Everyone works out and takes care of their bodies, but at the same time (they know) how to have a good time.' As one student puts it: 'It is rare to find an academically oriented soul on campus.'"

Thus sayeth the Greek freshman from out-of-state who's discovering how to "party" by getting drunk and stoned from his or her similarly-intoxicated Greek brothers/sisters. What a goof!


"Playboy spokeswoman Theresa Hennessey says the 2006 list is different from Playboy's last one in 2002, when ASU was No. 1, or the previous one in 1987, when the Sun Devils were 13th.

"'Others were pollings of students and readers,' she said. 'This time, it was just some editors who thought of some great party schools.'"

In other words, why waste all that money on asking people what they think? We'll just make it up as we go along. A small comfort to Dr. Crow, I imagine.

Of course, party rankings really don't mean all that much:

"'When students are hunting for a university, it's not a significant issue to students if it's on a party list,' Mark Nickel, spokesman for Brown University (33rd on Playboy's 1987 listing of party schools), said.

"But there's another concern about such ratings. John Lucas, a spokesman for the University of Wisconsin-Madison, blames the publications and Web sites for glorifying the party culture.

"'It causes a problem on campus,' Lucas says of Wisconsin's being ranked in the top 10 on some lists. 'It becomes self-fulfilling. Students say, "We need to follow those rankings. We have to drink more, not just three or four, but seven or eight, instead."

University of Wisconsin police have taken 44 students to the emergency room this fall because they were so drunk, Lucas says. That compares with 25 last fall."


On the other hand, the other article in the Arizona Republic backed up some of Dr. Crow's assertion about how Arizona State is becoming a top-notch university:

"Arizona State University is the country's fourth-highest producer of Fulbright scholars among public universities for the current school year.

"And while ASU ranks 13th nationally with 14 students participating in the country's largest international exchange program, the school's acceptance rate - nearly 40 percent - was higher than all Ivy League institutions.

"'It really does send a signal to the country that we are a very serious research university. It shows we have a wonderful faculty and students that are doing interesting things and I think that's important,' said Janet Burke, associate dean for national scholarship advisement and internships at the ASU Barrett Honors College."


Returning to the original article, Labels frustrate ASU, UA: Tempe fights party reputation; Tucson says it's not Dullsville, the Republic concluded by writing:

"For all the ballyhoo about which school is more about partying than academics, a closer examination of ASU and UA [the University of Arizona] finds they look a lot alike.

"For the 2004-05 freshman class, UA accepted 83 percent of applicants, while ASU accepted 86 percent. The average UA freshman's high school GPA was 3.4; ASU's was 3.3. The average SAT scores of the schools differed by only 10 points.

"Guess they'll have to sort out their real differences later tonight on the football field."

Which, of course, ASU won, 23-20. :)