Beloved Wives Day

In case you missed this news story, yesterday was Beloved Wives Day. A small organization in Tsumagoi, Japan, Nihon Aisaika Kyokai (NAK) or the "Japan Doting Husbands Association," had declared January 31st to be the day when Japanese men would return home from work by 8:00 p.m.

"On that day, a husband must prove himself by returning home before 8 p.m., sitting down to a family dinner, and telling his wife how much he appreciates her for all that she does every day for him and the family.

"The project was dubbed Otokono kitaku daisakusen or 'The great mission for guys to get home early.'"

According to the NAK website, "Many men can't put their feelings of gratitude toward their wives into words. Work is No. 1 for them. This attitude is putting Japanese marriages under great pressure."

The group urges men to improve the marital mood through five "golden rules," including going home early, calling wives by their given name and looking them in the eyes when talking. Many Japanese husbands call their wives "you" rather than addressing them by name, or in some cases merely grunt.

The group's homepage includes a column where husbands can write down either feelings they are too shy to say out loud or that they hope to say to their wives in the future, a trial run of sorts to see how the phrases look in advance.

'Your partner is your mirror. Let us respect each other forever and ever, and together lead a life filled with happiness and gratitude.'

'Though we fight from time to time, I feel very happy when I am with you.'

'I'm sorry I had a car accident. I'm sorry I'm away so much on business trips. I'm sorry I end up sleeping at the office so often. Thank you for loving me just the same.'

NAK was started by 45-year-old Kiyotaka Yamana, who runs his own business in Kawasaki. "Yamana was not always a doting husband. He used to work for an advertising company, a typical workaholic who cared little for family life. He never questioned his all-work, no-play lifestyle, until one day his wife confronted him.

"'You never took me seriously, ever,' she said. 'We never talked.'

"They soon divorced. When Yamana remarried three years ago, he felt he had learned his lesson. His vows with his new wife reflected his new state of mind: 'Let us grow old together, and become a great couple.'"

Ironically, Yamana's ex-wife has now said to him, "You've started something really interesting."

Sources:
Nihon Aisaika Kyokai
Beloved Wives Get a Holiday to Call Their Own
Japanese Men Declare 'Wives Day: Group Hopes to Show Men Care